Come home to your authentic self

What is your authentic self?

If you are not at home with your authentic self, now, where are you? And where is you authentic self? It’s late. Do you know where your authentic self is?

It sounds scary when I say it like that.

I’m not 100% sure I know all of my authentic self, I think some of him might well be defined by the shadows of me, rather than me, myself.

I know a guy who farts. Hey, don’t you be pretending you don’t, you little stinker. The big difference between the guy I know and me (and I’m guessing you) is that he farts in public. In meetings. In a most rabelaisian kind of way. Let’s say he likes to share his air. Needless to say, myself and others in meetings have been slightly horrified on his behalf.

But he sees our embarrassment as being wrong, or at least unfounded. We shouldn’t feel bad. He claims, for him it is the ultimate gesture of acceptance and friendship. He says, quite correctly I believe, in our society, you are more likely to have sex with someone you just met than fart in front of them. Farting is reserved for the most intimate of friends and confidants. Thus his farting in our presence is a mark of his respect and friendship for us.

Now before you go off at this idea, you sanctimoniously noble gas-free person, if you dig out footage of David Attenborough with the gorillas you’ll see (and hear) David making farting noises as he moves closer to the great apes. Why? Have you not read the above? Mutual farting in gorilla societies is a communication of respect, companionship and friendship. They also eat huge volumes of vegetable matter every day. Needs must. I’m guessing David simulated the sounds, as opposed to the genuine item – he is, after all, from the BBC. And their budget probably doesn’t extend to vegetable matter.

Come a step closer to home and your authentic self.


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